I’m freshly returned from World Fantasy and though I keep trying to settle down enough to write about how amazing an experience it was for me, I keep failing. There is so much to say and I don’t know all the words. Suffice to say it was mind-blowing.
One part of the conference which was particularly amazing for me was the open mic poetry reading Carolyn Clink put together. Yes, the same one I was just talking about a week ago and admitting how I was too big a wuss to participate.
The week-ago me was wrong.
I went to the reading and I participated! I read a very short piece, a haiku in fact, titled “Lovers” that was originally published in Star*Line. I was -so- nervous. I could barely breathe and I’m not sure exactly how my knees held me up, but I did it. I did it because I figured it would be easier to suck up my nerves and fear and do it than it would be to live with my self-condemnation for years and years to come for being too scared to do it. So basically, because it was easier in the long run.
I’m so glad I did, though even now my fingers get a bit shaky when I think about it. I honestly don’t know how big the audience is because I seriously had tunnel vision the whole time, but I heard someone say ‘This is a bigger audience than I would have expected at a poetry event.’ so that’s good.
Best of all, after I read no one booed, in fact, there were a few chuckles, so I guess I enunciated my words okay.
That was one heck of a way to get my poetry-reading cherry popped though. The people reading were:
- Joe Haldeman
- David Lunde
- Colleen Anderson
- Rhea Rose
- Eileen Kernaghan
- Rhonda Parrish
- Carolyn Clink
Yes! That really is my name on the same list as all those amazing poets! *swoon*. So I’ve done it. I don’t know if I’ll ever manage to find the courage to do it again, but…ah hell, who am I kidding? I’d totally do it again, and again, and again…and hopefully better each time. Just…not any time too soon.


I’m so glad you decided to read at the open mic, Rhonda. The next time will be easier — maybe even fun! — and if you were nervous, I didn’t notice at all.
Eileen
Really? Thank you so much, I’m glad my fear was well-hidden.